Monday, May 18, 2015

Fractured feelings and the rebirth of springtime

Azalea coming into bloom gladdens my heart.
Wow, there are days like today, when I feel as though I am drifting... It seems so surreal, and I cannot wait for the work day to be over. The emotional pain I feel, and the emptiness in my gut are so difficult to address as I work with kids in the classroom. When I finally arrive home, I am extremely drained and wander aimlessly through our property trying to find something to smile at...something to lighten my soul. And, there is always a burst of happiness, a little light, and then the darkness threatens to snuff out the flame. Such is the roller coaster I am riding after the death of my dear sister...
Wild blueberry gives me hope of sweet fruits

Begonia is so bright and cheery
My good friend, Lynne, had some wonderful words to impart through a letter she wrote to me. She said, "I was so saddened to read your blog and find that your sister had passed away. These losses leave us with few words that can bring any comfort. I suppose it is age that makes us suddenly aware of how precious life is. Every day brings more loss but I hope you find solace in your garden. I know that is where I go when I need peace. It is reassuring to see how nature constantly renews itself. Someday, we will all drift with the stars. I take some comfort in that..."
Solomon's Seal is incredibly elegant,
and is a feast for my eyes.

I find that I need my garden. I need nature. I need to see life renewing itself. This constant provides me with an anchor that I know will always be there when I require comfort. Thank you, Mother Nature, for giving me solace each day. Although I weep with deep sadness, I also find time to smile and give you a high five for all the wonders you impart to this world...

Lilac has me jumping for joy as this is
the first time it has ever blossomed
in the 10 years since I planted it!